April 2, 2018

I'm Naked!

A quick Google search for the most common nightmares reveals that many of us have nightmared (not a word, but "dreamed" seems too pleasant to use here) about being naked or "nekkid" as we say in my native tongue. You know the deal - you're on a stage, in a classroom, or down at (the) Walmart, and then the realization hits you...you ain't wearing a stitch of clothes.

This situation, as it should, ignites an inner monologue of critical analysis:
  • Everyone is staring at me! - OR - No one is even looking at me. Which is worse? 
  • Did I come here in my birthday suit? 
  • Did I just strip down spontaneously in aisle 7? Why? Why did I do this?
  • Why is Sponge Bob here? Maybe he will give me his pants. Why does he even wear pants? He's a SPONGE, for crying out loud.

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